Partners in Problems #2

    Some subjects that need to be talked about are difficult. They feel dangerous to bring up. Confrontation is not something many of us look forward to. When confrontation would flare up somewhere I was often at a loss as to how to deal without an argument. I knew that wasn’t what I wanted. So one day I said that.

“I don’t want to fight with you and I don’t know how to fix this without you. I want a solution that works for both of us.  One we are both okay with."
I said this out of desperation—it was the truth. It opened up a dialog that hadn't been available before. I found it far more fruitful to look for a solution. 
My default position is being right.  It is necessary for me when feeling the energy of confrontation, to remember I am looking for the solution... unless I'm not.